Autism is often spoken about in ways that don’t reflect everyone’s experience, especially for women. Until recently, most research was focused on the male experience, leaving many girls to grow up without a diagnosis. Research estimates there may be around 750,000 undiagnosed autistic adults (aged 20 and above) in England alone, many of whom will only discover their neurodivergence later in life (National Autistic Society, 2023).
I was diagnosed at the start of 2025, as part of a wider journey to improve my wellbeing through self-acceptance and kindness. It wasn’t until after the diagnosis that I began looking more deeply into autism, what it means, how it shows up differently in different people, and what it could mean for me both personally and in the workplace.
One of the first resources I came across was an excellent video from the National Autistic Society (South Hampshire Branch) highlighting the differences in how autism often presents in girls and women. Many traits, such as excelling academically, seeming “older beyond their years”, or preferring to be spoken to like an adult, are often praised in childhood. But while these behaviours can look like strengths on the surface, they may also mask underlying challenges.
In my case, these traits were reinforced positively by adults, which meant I grew up focusing on the “benefits” of autism without developing the foundations I needed to prevent burnout. That gap became especially obvious in the fast-paced, agile world of tech. For many women who receive a diagnosis later in life, repeated burnout can be the trigger that finally leads them to seek answers.
Looking back at previous roles, I saw reality hit the hardest on the projects that involved a lot of travel and client entertainment. On paper, the opportunity to work on high profile projects with trips to France and collaborating with clients on exciting technologies felt like the obvious next step, and an exciting one at that. But what I didn’t account for was masking for 18 hours a day, surrounded by my colleagues and clients at all times: breakfast, travelling, workshops, lunch, more workshops, and then dinner and socialising… sleep and repeat. I often found myself feeling completely overwhelmed and holding back tears, yet still pushing myself to keep up appearances. Looking back, I think even neurotypical colleagues would find it exhausting regardless. But for me, it took weeks to recover.
Although I was still getting great feedback from clients and my team, my memory was starting to falter and small mistakes were creeping into my work. Over time, this repetitive cycle of overextension, exhaustion, and recovery began to affect not just my projects, but also my personal wellbeing.
Autistic burnout is similar to regular burnout, but it stems specifically from the effort of trying to fit into a neurotypical world. In my case, trying to “power through” and employ even more coping strategies to appear typical only made things worse.
Thankfully, my manager at the time recognised the signs of burnout early. I was like a slowly boiling lobster, simmering away without being aware I was on the verge of cooking. They helped adjust my schedule and project workload to steer me back into safety and create a more sustainable rhythm. Most importantly, they provided options while also making recommendations when I felt overwhelmed, allowing me to maintain my agency over the situation. It showed me how powerful it can be when managers create space for different working styles, and how much stronger a team becomes when individuals don’t feel they have to mask.
Within a few weeks, I was back on my feet, confident and working independently again. Experiences like this highlighted not only the importance of supportive management, but also how crucial it is for autistic individuals to understand their own limits and communicate their needs without fear of perception.
In my continued exploration of self-acceptance and understanding, I started signing up for events that resonate with my personal experience and passion for diversity and inclusivity. So where does that leave me now?
A couple of changes later, I’m working here at ASquared, thoroughly in my comfort zone supporting the production of mobile and web apps in the B Corp space. I trust my colleagues to be open and honest with me, and I have the confidence to lean on them when I need support. I’m in a tight-knit, diverse team and feel like I can just be myself.
We have a simple “Way I like to work” document where you can share your preferences with the team (if you want to) on things like how you communicate, the conditions you work best in, what you struggle with, and what you enjoy. It’s a great way for new team members to feel heard from day one. This culture of openness and flexibility is also reflected in our working arrangements. We’re in the office two days a week, but you can come in more if it works better for you (which I often do). These might seem like small things, but they reinforce that everyone’s way of working is valid, and that kind of openness is what helps neurodiverse employees thrive.
The really exciting part is getting to learn more about incorporating accessibility into both the workplace and the projects we produce, helping to further normalise neurodiverse thinking in everything we do. At an event called NeuroCurious (organised by Jess Rad from The WomenHood), the speakers reframed autistic and ADHD traits like loyalty, problem-solving, and tenacity as competitive advantages. That perspective really stuck with me, because it reflected how I’ve started to see my own neurodivergence: not just as something to manage, but as a way of thinking that can bring value in the right environment. Seeing these approaches in action has also shown me how teams that embrace neurodiverse perspectives can become more creative, resilient, and inclusive. For me, that understanding has made navigating work feel not just possible, but energising, and it’s the kind of shift that can benefit whole workplaces, not just individuals.
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We’re always looking for more ways to make ASquared a place where everyone feels supported. In the next article, we’ll explore some adjustments and everyday practices that can help neurodiverse individuals thrive.
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